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Would you let your boyfriend take your kids to meet his family if you hate them?

I hate my boyfriends family but he wants to take our two kids that are 2 and 4 months to meet his mother, his brother, his brother's wife and their 2 kids on the weekend. His brother's wife I hate the most she is a stuck up cow and is mum is so fake. I told him when our first was born it was either his family or his kid and he chose us and cut them off but now he's pushing to have contact with them again all of a sudden. His mum calls him crying about it and makes him feel guilty. It's my choice and he doesn't get it.

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Answers (37)

No one listen to this stupid manipulating bitch. I don’t care whether this is real or not who the f**k says this shit? If this is real you are crazy & I hope your boyfriend leaves you and finds himself a nice caring girlfriend because hun by reading the comments you are absolutely bat shit crazy..

 Exactly!
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I’m starting to think this person is actually being serious and now I am worried for the kids mental health and well-being.
Everything your family in law have done isn’t even bad.. other women go through a lot more issues then you sweetheart.
I hope your boyfriend & children are okay and live the happiest life but I really think to do that they need to get away from you especially threatening to take away the children just because he wants his family in his life..

 Agreed.
If this post is for real I hope the partner gets help and gets out. This sort of emotional abuse could lead him to suicide.

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Please give your boyfriend my number so he can find out what it is like to have a respected women in his life. xx

OP Yeah soooo funny
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If they are not his children as well, then I wouldn’t let anyone take my kids somewhere I disapproved of. If he is their father, I think you should be going with him and the kids. He can’t help the family he comes from and you can’t expect him to cut off his family just because you think they are “stuck up” and “fake”. It was a silly ultimatum to make him choose between his family and you. If you want the love and respect of this man, you need to suck it up and let him (and his children) have a relationship with them.

OP Yes they are his kids, when our first was born they did come to the hospital to meet him and they didn't even say he was cute or whatever just "congratulations" ect and his niece who was 8 kept saying things like "I can't believe you have a baby" meaning because we are young then I was like nope you choose these stuck up cu**s or us.
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 So because they didn’t say your baby is cute you disowned them? Wow.
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 Wow if that is the extent of the problem then you are being extremely immature!
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OP He disowned them, he had a choice and he choseus but has obviously changed his mind because they are manipulating him with guilt like his mum has cancer and called him crying about it and it's not even bad cancer anyway
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OP And his stupid niece that is like 10 or 12 now sends him heart messages and shit like that for a guilt trip and I was like do you want to be close to her or to your own child? And he chose our own child and is backtracking
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 ^^^ I’m sorry - are you accusing an 8 year old of being fake or a “stuck up c**t” because she said she couldn’t believe you had a baby?! That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard 😡
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OP They aren't good people
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 Man, I sincerely hope you’re trolling. You didn’t give him a choice. Using your kids like that..... you’re the disgusting one. Not his family. How manipulative you are.

And FYI, all cancer is bad.

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OP I mean it's neck cancer or some shit not like lung cancer or whatever and the 8byear old was always saying rude blunt shit with no manners and would spam him with messages like love my uncle 😍😍😍😍😍 creepy.
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 ^ yeah, I’m going with troll. Only because I hope to god that people who are this INCREDIBLY STUPID AND SELFISH don’t actually exist.
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 So..... if he decided he wanted to see his family, you would stop him from seeing his children? Legally, no you can’t to that. And why would you want to do that to your kids? Deny them their father? I’m sure when they found out, they would thank you (not). And secondly, that speaks volumes about the kind of person you are. I too hope you’re trolling, and if not, I’m feeling very, very sorry for your kids.
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 Just neck cancer? OMG, not even a smart troll 😂
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 I think the best thing here would be for him to disown you.
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 Serious question. Are you jealous of your niece? Or do you feel threatened by her?
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 ^ it definitely sounds like she is
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 He didn't really choose to disown his family then, he was forced into picking an option dictated by you. Kind of like Sophie's Choice! Lol.
I do hope if you're serious about this post, you realise your actions are a form of domestic violence/abuse. I strongly recommend you seek professional help such as counseling etc, and try to overcome your insecurities regarding his family, and work on changing before your emotional abuse towards your partner, begins to escalate into more serious issues. Maybe there's more going on than you have shared with us, but You should realise that blackmailing someone into staying with you, using threats of reporting him to his job so he'll lose it, and threats of taking his kids so he'll never see them, is abuse and even if you don't see it that way, it's still very controlling, unhealthy behaviour! I do feel for you. I think there's a lot going on mentally for you, that needs intervention & professional help. Relationship counseling is a good start

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If I were the in-laws in this case I would be extremely grateful to have been ‘disowned’ and would happily give up any contact with the spawn of this abhorrent troll. If any of my children were stupid enough to breed with someone like this piece of shit (and they’d have to have a lobotomy before they’d ever reach that level of stupidity) then I would have failed as a mother.

 OMFG this is awesome! 😂
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I hate myself for wasting my time reading this troll’s bait. How can you not hate your own life if the only thing you have to keep yourself entertained is to write rubbish on the internet to deliberately annoy strangers?

This sounds like some bogan 13 year old who got pregnant so her boyfriend would never leave. Then she’s jealous of anyone else in his life that he cares about, so she was just looking for an excuse, any excuse to cut them out of his life. This poor bastard. I hope he takes the kids and does a runner.

OP Firstly I'm 22 and secondly I'm not jealous, they hate me for no good reason
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 ^ you’ve listed several good reasons for them to hate you. You’re just too deluded to see that you’re the one with the problem
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 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 This ^^^^^
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 You didn’t deny the part about getting pregnant so he would never leave, or being a bogan 😂😂😂
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 At least she’s honest then 😂
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If I was the boyfriend I would literally pack my bags and run far away from this crazy women..

OP Well he can but he wont see his kids ever again and he wont have a job any more either.
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OP His choice in the end
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 You're a poor excuse for a woman its people like you that give the rest of us a bad name. Your kids arent your belongings. What an emotionally abusive cow. Hope he does a runner with the kids.
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 Lol. It's just a troll.
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 Why wouldn't he have a job anymore if he left you?
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OP Because he is in the ADF and so I could make a big scene and fuss and say things and they can't just get rid of us from DHA. I have rights
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 You're the bottom of the barrel
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 ^^ just when I thought you could get any more nasty. Wow. I pity your kids. what a vindictive mother they have.
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 Lol I’m in the ADF so I know you’re full of shit. I really hope you do try to cause a scene and it bites you in the arse.
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OP Then you know they cant just kick me out of DH because he says so and I can tell them heaps anyway
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 No but he won’t lose his job you moron. What is it that you can tell them? Maybe there’s more to this story and you actually are a victim but so far it’s only the people who know you who are suffering.
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 Op you are a manipulative, controlling and narcissistic sounding person. Maybe seek counseling
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 Let’s name the OP Victoria for this example.
As mums we all have that one mum whether we go to mothers groups/school ect that just gets on our nerves.. like I mean everything that comes out of there mouths we just want to punch them in the throat. BUT as mums we just suck it up because our kids are friends with there kids and we just want our little ones to be happy so we just Fake laugh, smile and finish our coffee while the kids are playing on the play equipment... Victoria doesn’t apply to this rule if I heard the stuff she has been saying on this page in person I would pull her to the side and probably knock her the f**k out.. then I hope her mother in law and boyfriend are there so we can drink beautiful coffee and play with the kids with so much satisfaction

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 ^ I hope ‘Victoria’ says some of this crap in front of someone from whatever Defence unit her boyfriend is from. ADF loyalty doesn’t stretch to vindictive defacto bi****s.
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 Hahaha you really are an idiot. Defence housing is only fir defence families. When he leaves your pathetic arse you won't be a defence spouse so you will need to find other accommodation.
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 ^ no no no! She’s a special case because she has shitty in laws! She’ll get to keep the service residence and the boyfriend will get a dishonourable discharge for being mean and not disowning his family! 🤦‍♀️
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Do you have a good relationship with your own family? It sounds like you need some guidance and good influences in your life.

 OP *this* is helpful advice! Seek help now while you’re still young enough to turn your life around.
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I am amazed that none of his relatives haven't slapped you into next week. If someone called my 8 year old daughter a c**t because she said I can't believe you had a baby they better start running.

 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
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I'm going to say this but I'm pretty sure your going to ignore it but have you considered counseling for yourself or for the whole family? It's healthy to try and fix problems and learn how to coexist for your partner and children. Don't you think your children will want/need that side of the family in the future. You don't know what the future will bring, having more people in your corner in life is a positive thing.

I really dislike my mother in law for many reasons but I put all that aside for the sake of my kids. How I feel has nothing to do with them. They deserve a relationship with their grandmother. And when they are older they can decide for themselves how they feel. Unless your partner’s family are abusive or negligent then you really should take the high road and let your kids see them. You dont have to get involved. Let your partner take them. And stop with the ultimatums. They are destructive and they are childish. You really had no right to make him choose between his child or his family. What an impossible position you put him in.

 I’m the same and my reasons are actually justified unlike any of the stupid excuses OP has used. I’ll never like my in-laws and they’ll never like me but we’re always civil to each other and I’ve never stopped them from having a relationship with my kids. I do believe there are cases when it’s best to cut off all contact but OP hasn’t provided a convincing argument at all.
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OP How are your reasons better than mine? Said who? Let them all judge your reason then.
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 The reasons are irrelevant. And has she said that her reasons for disliking her in-laws are more valid than yours? Read the response. She said she put aside her issues for the sake of her kids. That is your take away from this.
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What monsters not doting over you and making you feel special. How could your MIL get cancer? Doesn’t she know that it’s taking the attention away from you? I agree, cut them out and leave hubby. You can’t have those sorts of horrible in-laws.

OP Theyve done bad things I wrote them on the comments replies.
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 I read them. How dare your SIL backstab you like that. She sounds horrible. And your mil going back on your deal. Monsters. They’re worse than my in-laws. My mil told me if I ever got pregnant again she would shove a vacuum up my cooch and suck the little fucker out. Bad in-laws but not nearly as bad as yours.
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I hope my son's never get a girlfriend like you. I'm going to join a religion now so I can start praying they dont

Please get counselling. It would be free for you as you're a spouse of a serving member. You need a serious wake up call. You are abusive and need to work on changing this.

 Yes, contact DCO, they’ll point you in the right direction
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